


We Could Use a Miracle

by thelonesometraintoillinois



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Depression, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-05-20
Packaged: 2018-05-28 22:22:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6347881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelonesometraintoillinois/pseuds/thelonesometraintoillinois
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Should I end it here or keep going I'm open to ideas</p></blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

Paper thin, paper white wings flutter to life as bright sunlight beams through the room. You swirl around the space, surrounded by hundreds of other gleaming bodies, cutting through the shadows and basking in the sudden warmth. 

You feel a pull, something tugging you toward the center of the room, where a dark figure stands with his hand outstretched. You land on the palm, strong little legs holding you up, and then everything is dark for a moment. There’s a crackling sensation spreading through your tiny body, making you heavy, and so cold, and then - you’re light again. You flap your wings. They shimmer in the strips of light, no longer alabaster. A deep voice growls from above you, and an image appears in your mind - a blonde boy, sitting alone, frozen inside. You fly.

 

Adrien sits in his room, staring blankly up at a computer screen. He’s caught up on the Ladyblog, but he scrolls through anyway. If he could just be himself with Ladybug - if he could spend time with her normally - maybe he would feel better. Plagg is asleep somewhere, and Adrien doesn’t think it’s worth it to wake him just for the company. He checks the time. His father probably won’t be home for dinner. He rarely is. 

Reaching out, Adrien pulls the blue knit scarf his father gave him for his birthday off his door handle. The wool is soft, warm. He wraps it gently around his neck, clutching the ends tightly in cold fingers. If only the scarf could warm him up on the inside. He closes his eyes, wishing for something, anything, to make him feel better. Anything to make him not feel so empty. He wishes for his father to come home. For Ladybug to actually show a genuine interest in at least being his friend. For just a hug, even. 

He doesn’t see the butterfly float through his open window and light softly on the folds of the scarf. He feels it though. A crackling, and a voice - 

 

Marinette is walking home with Alya when she notices something strange. The chilly autumn breeze has been persistent throughout the day, but as she passes a stranger on the sidewalk, heat floods through her. Sweat trickles down her back, and she stops in her tracks, staring at the man as he rushes past, clearly distressed. He’s undressing as he goes. The rush of warmth follows him, and Marinette thinks maybe she should too. That was definitely out of the ordinary. She worriedly places a hand on her bag, hoping Tikki is ready for a workout. 

Alya already has her phone out and ready to record, glancing over at Marinette. “That was weird. Do you think it’s a bad guy?”

“Maybe… hey, I just realized I left something at school. You go on, I’ll catch up.”

“Of course you did. I’ll follow that guy, see if Ladybug shows up!”

Marinette smiles nervously, quickly turning and sprinting away. She ducks into an alley, unzipping her bag and letting Tikki out. The transformation is quick, and Ladybug is ready to go. She swings up onto a roof, looking out over the streets. Alya isn’t far away, close on the heels of the now almost naked overheating man. He’s making a beeline for the park, probably for the fountain. Alya can deal with him, Ladybug decides. He’s just a victim. She has to find the source. 

Scanning the people scattered between buildings and roads, she searches for anyone panicking or undressing. One woman is emptying a water bottle over her head. Another, a little farther down the street, is frantically ripping off layers. Ladybug follows the trail. 

Sure enough, less than two minutes away, a clearly akumatized human is standing in the center of a road, bundled up in jackets and hats, brushing against anyone who passes. Heat radiates from where they stand, and a strangely familiar light blue scarf flaps in the waves of hot air. Ladybug looks closer. The person is facing away from her, but sticking out from under a hat is blonde hair that she recognizes. 

Adrien. Her heart skips a beat, and she stumbles, sliding down the shingles on the roof she’s perched on. Shaking her head, she reminds herself that she’s fought and saved Alya before. She needs to focus. Tikki gives her a warning look, and she nods, steadying herself. She can do this. 

Ladybug leaps from the roof, landing lightly on her feet a few feet behind Adrien. He turns, and when they lock eyes, her heart chills, even as the air around her rises in temperature. His eyes are cold and lifeless. Slowly, almost lazily, Adrien twirls the end of his scarf around a finger and steps toward her, reaching out his other arm. She skips back, swinging her yo yo at him, and he looks balefully up at her as his arms are pulled tight to his sides and he loses his balance.

A bad feeling is spreading through her insides. She’s never seen Adrien like this. With Alya, it was clear to see what emotions the Akuma had preyed on and amplified. Adrien, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to have any emotions at all. What happened to him?

She reaches for his scarf, but as soon as she touches it, she feels like she’s on fire. Her blood is turning to steam and evaporating through her skin. Her organs are melting together. Sweat pours down her sides, her face, her knees. She can’t help dropping the scarf and falling backwards. Adrien just watches her, still. The only indication that he’s actually registering what’s happening at all is that he’s focused almost solely on her earrings. 

Biting her lip, struggling to draw a breath, Ladybug pushes painfully off the ground and grabs the scarf. She’s weak, and it takes an embarrassing amount of effort to tear the wool apart. She can’t do it. Where’s Chat Noir when you need him? 

For once, her lucky charm has an obvious application. A pair of red and black fabric cutters. She cuts the scarf in half, dropping it to the ground. The black butterfly spins up into the air, and she captures it with what little strength she has left. Black spots swim behind her eyes, and a floating sensation envelops her brain. Struggling through, she lets the now-white butterfly go, whispering her usual goodbye. 

She nearly passes out, falling again to the cobblestones, but the air around her cools noticeably. She slowly regains feeling in her limbs, and her vision clears. When she has the strength to sit up, she sees Adrien in front of her, staring in horror.

“Are you okay?” He sounds panicked.

Ladybug feels the blush in her cheeks, and she’s thankful for the mask partially covering her face. How can she talk to him? But she has to. She’s not Marinette right now. Not to him. She draws on the confidence her suit usually gives her, and accepts the offered hand, reveling in the feeling of their fingers meeting. 

“I’m alright. Everything’s fine.” She offers a weak smile. “Are you okay though?” A much more important question. 

He doesn’t answer, just bites his lip and glances at her ear, and she’s confused for a second, until she realizes. She straightens up, a jolt shooting through her chest. 

“I have to go!” She would love to stay here with Adrien, to make sure he’s alright, although of course he won’t remember any of what happened, but he can’t know who she is.

When she pulls away, reluctantly extricating her hand from his, he looks crestfallen for a moment, and her heart nearly breaks. What’s wrong with him? She doesn’t have time. She breaks into a run, finding somewhere hidden to transform into herself. 

Peering out at the street, she lets herself hope that Adrien hasn’t left yet, but of course he has. She steps out, looking around, but he’s out of sight. Sighing heavily, she turns in the direction of home. She should find Alya. 

 

Adrien can’t believe he left Ladybug all alone to fight. To fight him, no less! How could he be so weak? He throws himself onto his bed, covering his face with his hands. She must have been wondering where he was. He hurt her. He left her alone…

A sob builds in his chest, and he tries to hold it back, but it racks his body. He can’t stop himself from crying. Curling into himself, he buries his face in the bed. He wishes he could just die. Even now, when it seems like everything hurts, there’s a hole where his heart should be. He cares so much and not at all at the same time, and the dichotomy tears him apart.

 

Sitting behind Adrien at school is torture, but at least he’s there. How can she find out if he’s okay without giving away her identity? How can she find out if he’s okay without being able to even talk to him? 

When class gets out, Alya grabs Nino’s arm and asks him about something or other, and Marinette is left to awkwardly avoid Adrien’s gaze. She nervously flips through her sketchbook, but something must have caught Adrien’s eye, because he looks at her and smiles. Her soul nearly leaves her body.

“Can I see some of your drawings Marinette?”

The freckles on his nose and cheeks are honestly so distracting. She tries to speak, but all that comes out is a squeak. Embarrassed, she covers her face and simply hands him the book. He raises an eyebrow, but takes it, and looks at the first page he opens to. The blood drains completely from Marinette’s face. It’s a sketch of herself. As Ladybug. 

A grin spreads on his face, and she panics a little. He can’t know. No one can know!

“This is really good. I’m a big fan of Ladybug.”

Marinette’s eyes widen. Maybe she could tell him... No. She shakes her head. “Take it!” She hears a laugh from Alya, and wishes she could kick herself. “I mean, thank you! Me too! Saving people, and, and, you know. Ladybug! Yay!” She would love to disappear right about now.

Adrien seems confused, but he’s still smiling as he hands her sketchbook back. She drops it. He laughs, and bends down to pick it up, but she does too. Their heads knock painfully, and he places a hand on her arm, apologizing. She can’t take this anymore. She stands up straight and says, “I think I left my pen in the classroom, actually. I’ll be right back,” and makes a hasty retreat.

 

The sketchbook is still on the ground, so Adrien picks it up and hands it to Alya.He’d love the picture of Ladybug, but it belongs to Marinette. He has to meet his ride, so he waves goodbye to her and Nino, and makes his way to the door. He has a modeling job in the park, some new design of his father’s, and he can’t be late again. He doesn’t think he can handle another round of being yelled at. 

It’s warm today, the air still, and as he leans his head against the car window, he imagines going out for ice cream with Ladybug. Just hanging out in the sunshine, talking and getting to know each other. He has an intense, perpetual urge to just… learn about her life. He shuts his eyes. That’s never going to happen. She doesn’t care who he really is, and she refuses to let him know who she really is. For all he knows, she’s already in love with someone else. 

The modeling goes by quickly, with little conflict. He mindlessly follows directions, posing and smiling, but his mind is somewhere far away. Somewhere where his crush cares about him, and his father actually wants to spend time with him. 

It’s bad, but he finds himself hoping for some disaster. Something to bring Ladybug and him together. When the photographer lets him go, he wanders over to a park bench under a tree and sits. He should go home, but what’s the point? Natalie’s the only one there. He texts Nino, but he knows his friend has work. Sighing, he leans back, staring up into the rippling leaves above him. He’s spectacularly lonely. Plagg isn’t much help, munching on cheese in the bottom of his bag. 

“If you get cheese on my school books, I’m not going to be happy.” There’s no one around to see Adrien seemingly talking to himself, but he still feels a bit self conscious. The only answer is a tiny scoff. He rolls his eyes. 

Across the park, sunlight catches on a flash of dark hair, and excitement flares in his chest, but of course it isn’t Ladybug. It’s a calm day, with no evildoers in sight. He squints at the figure in the distance, and waves when he realizes it’s Marinette. She isn’t the best at holding a conversation, at least not with him, but she’s friendly and she’s pretty cool. Better her company than no one’s. 

She crosses the park, waving back, and as she gets closer he sees her stumble a few times. Her face is bright pink by the time she reaches him, and he wonders why he’s never noticed what a pretty shade of blue her eyes are.

“Hi Marinette.”

“H-hi! What’s up?” She’s clutching her hands together tightly in front of her body, and he wishes she could calm down around him. She never seems so nervous around anyone else. He wonders why. He could ask, but that doesn’t seem like it would help her relax. 

“I just got done with a shoot, what about you?” 

“Oh, I’m just happy to see you! I mean, uh, I was just going for a walk. When I saw you. It’s a nice day!” The look on her face is honestly painful. Adrien frowns. 

“Want to sit down? You seem stressed.”

“Um… sure.” Marinette carefully balances herself on the very edge of the bench, and Adrien shakes his head. 

“Can I ask you something?" She nods cautiously and he continues. "Do you have a problem with me?”

She shoots up, vigorously shaking her head. “Of course not! You’re perfect!”

They stare at each other for an awkward moment, then he reaches out and tugs on her sleeve. She sits and stares at the ground. He watches her. “So… what is it then? You never act like this with anyone else.”

“I - uh, I don’t know.”

 

This is her chance! Alya would want her to take it. She wants to take it. She has to! She was going to ask if he was alright, but she could do that later. “I guess, I mean, it’s cause I like you!” Oh no. That came out too fast. Oh no! He’s never going to talk to her again. Marinette is screaming internally, and she can’t look at him, and she can tell he’s just staring, and oh no.  
“Really?”

She squeezes her eyes shut and nods. 

“Huh. Why?”

Frowning, she opens her eyes and slowly looks up at him. She can feel her face burning, and she’s so embarrassed, but how could he ask that? Everyone likes him, it’s not like she’s alone in this. “What do you mean?”

He wrinkles his nose, and his freckles, oh my God. She can’t believe she just confessed to him. “I guess I just don’t feel all that likeable.” 

“Are you kidding me? Everyone likes you!”

“Not everyone,” he mumbles. Marinette’s eyes widen. Of course he already likes someone. 

“You have a crush, I guess?” She looks down again. 

“Oh. Um, yeah. Sorry. You’re great, I just - I’m already… yeah.” This is the first time she’s seen Adrien stumble over his words.

Marinette forces herself to smile at him. “Well I bet they do like you! You should talk to them.” Not that that worked out for her. She can feel tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. 

Adrien is about to speak, but they’re both jolted to their feet by the sound of screams. 

Marinette reaches for her bag, glancing around. Where to transform? Behind the carousel. “I have to run, it was nice talking!” She doesn’t bother waiting for a response. She just runs. 

 

Chat Noir fights. He gives himself over to the fight. He works well with Ladybug. He wonders if she thinks so too. Mostly, though, he lets his body lead and his mind fall behind. He’s so tired. He’ll save the world, and then he’ll go home. Ladybug won’t want him to stick around. They get rid of some villain together, and he’s vaguely aware that he’s flirting as usual, but it’s all muscle memory. He’s not feeling it. 

Marinette told him she likes him. He could tell she was about to cry. He probably would’ve chased after her if he hadn’t had to go help Ladybug. She’s such a sweet person, and so talented. She deserves someone better than him. Ladybug does too. It’s no wonder she’s not interested. 

Before he knows it the fight is over. Ladybug is holding out a fist, and he pounds it. He hadn’t realized before, but she looks pretty upset as well. 

“You okay Lady?”

She sniffles, and nods. “I’m alright. Everything’s fine.” It’s what she said when she saved him. She didn’t know it was him, of course. He raises an eyebrow. She nods at his ring, which is blinking away. “You should get going.”

He knows she’s not going to agree, but he tries anyway. “Maybe I shouldn’t.”

She crosses her arms. “Cat-”

“I know, I know. I just… I want to get to know you.” Marinette told him to talk to his crush. Obviously Ladybug doesn’t feel the same way, but maybe they can be friends. “Can I tell you something?”

“We don’t have time. Can it wait? I’m going to go.” She looks worried, and as she passes, she places a hand on his shoulder. “Take care of yourself Chat Noir.”

She’s far away and someone else when Adrien drops into a crouch, hugging his knees to his chest, and whispers, “I need you.”


	2. Chapter Two

Marinette can’t say she’s surprised that Adrien likes someone else, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. As soon as she returned home from fighting the akuma, she had called Alya and told her what had happened. They’re texting back and forth now, Alya thinking of increasingly ridiculous ways to win the boy’s heart, and Marinette trying to channel her heavy emotions into laughter instead of tears. 

As much as she wants to curl up and cry herself to sleep, she can’t help feeling a small sense of pride. She can rarely hold a conversation with the boy, and today she confessed her feelings to him. It didn’t turn out the way she had hoped, but she was brave enough to do it. That’s something. 

Marinette smiles gently at the posters on her wall. Adrien, posing in different positions and different clothing, but with the same confident air in every one. She had thought at first that he would be arrogant and rude, like Chloe, but he had changed her mind instantly. He was good to her. He’s good to everyone. Marinette hopes that now that he knows how she feels, he’ll still want to be friends. She knows it can’t be easy for him to try to be her friend, but as Alya comes up with yet another farfetched plan, Marinette makes a resolve to get over him. She’ll focus instead on really getting to know him. 

She looks up at Tikki, and whispers, “This is going to be great.”

 

Adrien is feeling particularly down about Ladybug, but also, surprisingly, about Marinette. She likes him - that’s the only reason she’s always so nervous around him. He wishes he had understood that earlier. Maybe they could have worked it out. Maybe, he thinks, typing into a search bar, it isn’t too late. He pushes past the darkness swirling in his brain and fights to remain hopeful. Marinette must be upset about his rejection, but he didn’t get to explain that he still really likes her. He’s always wanted to be her friend. Ever since they met. 

He remembers that day, in the rain, the first time she smiled at him. Their fingers had brushed. He had laughed so hard… He had told Plagg that they would be friends. It had never really happened, unfortunately. Despite the umbrella and the explanation about the gum, despite her laughter and seeming gratitude, she had never seemed comfortable around him. It had been getting somewhat better, and he had never pushed, just staying as friendly as possible, and now he understands the problem. 

Now maybe they can start to get to know each other. He just has to make sure she knows that he wants it. 

 

All through school, Marinette has trouble meeting Adrien’s eyes, but she tries. Oh, she tries. She steels herself up, begging herself to be strong. She tells herself that this is for her own good. That if Adrien had decided to avoid her, he wouldn’t keep turning around to ask her random questions about their schoolwork. Questions that Nino could definitely answer.

Alya keeps turning to her as well, every time Adrien returns to his own work, and raising her eyebrows with a smirk. Silently implying that maybe Adrien is interested. Marinette doesn’t believe that. He’s just being kind, as always. Trying to show her that he doesn’t hate her now. Still, it’s nice, and Marinette feels a deep sense of calm. She’s spent all year on a silly crush, and now that she knows it won’t work out, she feels almost free. It definitely helps that Adrien isn’t ignoring her. She hasn’t lost him. This is going to be okay. 

Of course, her crush hasn’t just magically vanished. If only, she sighs. She still feels flutters in her chest when she sees his sparkling green eyes, or the tiny freckles spattered across his tan skin. Butterflies and knots in her stomach when he walks into a room or when he turns in his chair to smile up at her. Mind over matter, Marinette. She just needs to be able to talk to him coherently. Maybe her crush will fade over time, and maybe it won’t, but as long as she isn’t wishing and dreaming and hoping for him to fall in love with her, she can stop worrying about his approval and just be herself. Just be his friend. 

Suddenly, she wants to be able to do that more than anything. 

At the end of the day, Marinette hops lightly down the stone steps to the sidewalk, Alya close behind. They’re about to start walking home when a shout stops them in their tracks. Nino flies down the steps, skidding to a halt when Alya catches him by the shoulders, grinning.   
“Where’s the fire?”

Nino pants heavily, readjusting his glasses over his large, hooked nose before answering. “Adrien and I were wondering if you guys wanted to join us for a movie tonight.”

“Nino, you have my number. You could’ve just texted.” Alya is smiling, though, and although Adrien’s name sent a thrill through Marinette, she smiles too. 

Footsteps sound from behind Nino, and all three teens look up to see Adrien himself descending towards them. “Hey guys,” he smiles, waving. 

Marinette’s heart clenches, but she takes a deep breath, fights to keep a straight face, and waves as calmly as she can. His smile widens slightly, stealing Marinette’s breath momentarily. His golden hair glows in the sunlight, and he looks like an angel. An angel who you’re going to be friends with, Marinette. Keep yourself together. 

When Alya speaks again, she addresses Adrien. “I’d love to go to a movie, how about you Marinette?” A sharp elbow pokes Marinette in the side, and she glares at her friend, who’s inconspicuously trying not to grin. 

Marinette forces herself to look at Adrien and speak using real words. She can face him. She has to. “I’ll have to ask my parents, but I’m sure I can come. What movie were you thinking?”

 

It’s amazing, Adrien thinks. She had been avoiding eye contact all day, answering his questions in monosyllabic phrases, and he had thought that he would have to talk to her about being friends. A feeling of dread and apprehension had settled in his chest. Now, though, she’s looking at him. She’s answering! Her clear blue eyes look straight into his, and she seems strained, but she’s speaking clearly as well. A glow lights up in his heart. She’s visibly trying. She’s not giving up on him! He has the sudden urge to run up and hug her, but that would probably be too much. 

Instead, he leans an elbow on Nino’s shoulder and pulls out his phone. He had looked up the nearest cinemas last night, and chosen one that was playing movies he thought might appeal to his friends. Holding out the screen so all three can see it, he says, “Whatever you want,” and smiles directly at Marinette. She bites her lip and clasps her hands together, but she doesn’t look away, even when Alya wraps auburn arms around her shoulders and whispers something in her ear. Marinette flushes, squeaking a bit, but her eyes stay fixed on his, and he feels a little rush. This girl actually likes me, is his first thought, and then, This girl is going to be my friend. 

 

Nino and Alya argue for a few minutes, but eventually they settle on a movie, and agree to meet later at the theater. Marinette’s parents let her go with minimal teasing after she agrees to help her mother frost a few batches of cupcakes, and even Alya doesn’t send too many suggestive texts. Marinette is feeling confident about her resolve, right up until Alya manages to orchestrate the seating arrangements in a way that forces Marinette to sit next to Adrien. She somehow manages to pay attention to the movie, but she can feel the heat from his bare arms, and every time he shifts in his seat his leg brushes against hers. Occasionally, he leans over and makes comments in her ear. She can barely laugh at them, she’s so tense. This is going to kill her. 

Finally, mercifully, the movie ends, and Adrien pushes himself up out of his seat. Away from her. Marinette is disappointed and relieved at the same time, and Alya must see that in her face, because she smirks at her. Marinette sticks out her tongue, but Alya is already turning to say something to Nino. The only one who sees her is Adrien. 

The heat in her face could power one of her parents’ ovens. He just smiles at her.

**Author's Note:**

> Should I end it here or keep going I'm open to ideas


End file.
